Funny Quotes About Attraction

Best Funny quotes about attraction

Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?

Mae West

Wouldn't it be great if we lived in a world where insecurity and desperation made us more attractive?

Albert Brookes

Ah, sweet pity. Where would my love life have been without it?

Homer Simpson

I have no sex appeal. I have to blindfold my vibrator.

Joan Rivers

Men aren't attracted to me by my mind. They're attracted to me by what I don't mind.

Gypsy Rose Lee

A girl who is bespectacled, She may not get her nectacled.

Ogden Nash

I don't have a type. It took me this long to narrow it down to gender.

Ellen DeGeneres

See the mothers in the park, Ugly creatures chiefly; Someone must have loved them once - in the dark and briefly.


Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.

Dorothy Parker

Men of every age flocked around Diana Cooper like gulls around a council tip.

John Carey

She would serve after a long voyage at sea.

William Shakespeare

Those aren't come-to-bed eyes - who needs a bed?

William Mcilvanney

When she raises her eyelids, it's as if she were taking off all her clothes.


According to a recent survey, men say the first thing they notice about women in their eyes. And women say the first thing they notice about men is they're a bunch of liars.

Jay Leno

Sex appeal is fifty per cent what you've got and fifty percent what people think you've got.

Sophia Loren

I'll sing to you, bring spring to you, And worship the trousers that cling to you, Bewitched, bothered and bewildered am I.

Lorenz Hart

I look like the girl next door - if you happen to live next to an amusement park.

Dolly Parton

It's called a Wonderbra because when you take it off, the guy is thinking 'I wonder where her boobs went?

Rebecca Nell

I was so flat I used to put Xs on my chest and write, 'You are here.' I wore angora sweaters just so the guys would have somethingto pet.

Joan Rivers

No man has ever tried to look up a woman's nostril. You don't unhook anything to get to a nose.

Jerry Seinfeld

Elizabeth Taylor looks like two small boys fighting underneath a mink blanket.

Mr Blackwell

Working with Sophia Loren was like being bombed with watermelons.

Alan Ladd

A lot of guys think the larger the woman's breasts are, the less intelligent she is. I think it's the opposite. I think the larger the woman's breasts are, the less intelligent the men become.

Anita Wise

Her breasts filled out the front of her blouse like the humps of a small camel. Not the kind you smoke, but the kind you ride.

Kinky Friedman

He was formed for the ruin of our sex.

Tobias Smollett

Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.

Dave Barry

You wouldn't have to be drunk to bed Catherine Deneuve, I don't care what your sexual history to that point had been.

Susan Sarandon

I have so little sex appeal my gynaecologist calls me 'sir'.

Joan Rivers

To attract men, I wear a perfume called 'New Car Interior'.

Rita Rudner

Men always say the most important thing in a woman is a sense of humour. You want to know what that means? He's looking for someone to laugh at hisjokes.

Sheila Wenz

Choosing a won is like choosing a car - we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pickup truck, and end up with a station wagon.

Tim Allen

Friend of mine wrote a book called 'How to attract Men'. Her main advise was to be naked and have a bar by your bed.

John Waters

Most Women are attracted to the simple things in life. Like men.

Henny Youngman

So, Debbie McGee, what first attracted you to the millionaire Paul Daniels?

Mrs Merton

_Will you look at her! Oh my God. If I wasn't married, you know what I'd do? _Wear the same underwear every day?

Bernie stein and Ray Barone, Everybody Loves Raymond

If you're given a choice between money and sex appeal, take the money. As you get older, money becomes your sex appeal.

Katherine Hepburn

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