I hadn’t been there since her poor husband’s death. I never saw a woman so altered; she looks quite 20 years younger.
Oscar Wilde
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My husband, Norm, is no longer with us. I often go to the cemetery and buff up his obelisk.
Dame Edna Everage -
I know a woman who had her husband cremated and then mixed his ashes with grass and smoked him. She said it was the best he’d made her feel in years.
Maureen Murphy -
I want to be buried in Kilbarrack. It’s the healthiest graveyard in Ireland being near the see.
Brendan Behan -
I told my wife I want to be cremated. She’s planning a barbecue.
Rodney Dangerfield -
Where would I like my ashes scattered? I don’t know. Surprise me.
Bob Hope -
Did you see the crowds at the Harry Cohn’s funeral? It proves what they always say: give the public what they want to see, and they’ll come out for it.
Red Skelton -
The reason so many people showed up at Louis B. Mayer’s funeral was because they wanted to make sure he was dead.
Samuel Goldwyn -
They say such lovely things about people at their funerals, it’s a shame I’m going to miss mine by just a few days.
Bob Monkhouse -
I used to hate weddings – all those old dears poking me in the stomach and saying ‘You’re next.’ But they stopped all that when I started doing the same to them at funerals.
Gail Flynn